Training the brain

Plans, adjustments, differentiation...  A recent professional development reminded me that reflecting on everything is what makes a difference.  A well-planned lesson is a necessary start to achieving student mastery; however, once the lesson is over, the reflecting and refining and revising play another necessary part.  These reflections aren't just useful for students, but for us as a team of professionals.  I've never thought of teachers as teaching on their separate "islands," but rather as a collection of like-minded colleagues with similar goals, dreams, hopes for the children they serve.  By thinking critically about our lessons, we are training ourselves to reflect for the good of the students, which then leads to a collaboration of various ideas within our teaching departments.

With collaboration sometimes comes differing views.  Someone told me that "none of us like everyone we work with," which made me pause and think, "sure, but in this profession, liking or not liking a coworker shouldn't matter; what matters is a similar vision for the students."  In these times where disagreements and differences of opinions stop us short of constructive criticisms, ongoing discussions, and meaningful debates, I plan to critically look past differences, and uncover solutions, just as I would encourage students to do.

These trying times have affected our youth in ways that many of my colleagues are struggling with ourselves.  I've come to process it by training the brain with "growth mindset":

I realize this a gross simplification of complex issues, but maybe it's a start to having tough conversations.  This could lead to recognizing perspectives, brainstorming solutions, and attempting those solutions.  Maybe by modeling this communication pattern for our youth, they can start to build each other up, instead of tear each other down.

My middle school released 17 balloons to remember each victim of the Parkland shooting.

At home, we are consciously practicing critical thinking together.  The boys (10 and 8) have made comments about the world, of course with some influence from their friends.  We openly discuss what their opinions are, and we as parents try our best to present the facts before they make a conclusion.

For example, Jesse one day had an honest question about Trump's wall.  We had a discussion about what walls physically do, and what he thinks the purpose of it would be.  We guessed how much it would cost.  He replied, "A fortune!"  We then Googled the cost and estimated efficiency of such a construction.  We then asked what other ways we could try to solve this issue.  Jesse said some of the billions of dollars could be spent on helping the poor.

Another example of practicing critical thinking is when reflecting on their day: "What was something that made you proud today?"  Or we'd pick from this list, instead of the old "How was school?"  where the critical thinking often disappears in a one-word response like "Good."

Visiting Oklahoma University

Even more, just as in the classroom, we discuss books, movies, tv shows, song lyrics and when we get there, social media.  The more we arm our youth with ways to constructively analyze what is presented to them, the more they can make sound judgments and conclusions, and maybe not end up swallowing Tide Pods.

When someone makes a statement that we don't immediately agree with, we may feel anger, confusion, disgust.  Let's read and learn with our kids.  Let's encourage them make the choice to figure out the ways to use critical thinking skills to not just stick with "let's agree to disagree." Training the brain is an interesting way to #buryboyswillbeboys.

P.S.  Even though "This is Us" is fiction, so many connections and parenting nuggets!

Speaking up and speaking out

Don't complain if you're not going to do anything about it. Solve your problem. Don't be a bystander.

In the classroom, a lot of learning happens, but also a lot of whining happens.

• I don't have a pencil. 
• He touched my shoe. 
• She made fun of the way I write.  
• He laughed at me.
• This is hard.
• I'm not good at writing.

Well, children, speak up.  To that person.  To yourself.  Figure out how to get past the problem. I respond by going to "growth mindset" (Google, read more here or here) and pointing to my classroom wall.  Students rephrase or ask a question to help themselves.

(Image from Google; variations of this are found in classrooms at our school)

At home, the boys can get under each other's skin.  The two of them mostly get along, but living with, playing with, sharing a room with, breathing with one another 24/7 is not always high-fives and hugs.  Jesse, being the younger, tries to play this card often: "I'm telling!" We hear that, and automatically say, "tell HIM, not us."  Tell him to stop ____; tell him you don't like that; tell him you'd rather play something else. Oh, and use a calm voice while you're at it.

Their out-of-town sleepover without us was our "test" to see if he could handle his brother being a "big bother" instead of "big brother." And the result: he's not there YET lol.

Jason with long hair when he became a "big brother."

We're glad Jason is one to speak up.  When a classmate said, "I can't run. I just can't do it!" and was about to give up, he and his friends cheered her on.  With encouraging words, she did it.

We're also glad Jesse's learning "growth mindset" strategies in his own classroom as well.  He even showed me the youtube video they watched found here.  We constantly talk and use language that helps him connect to different situations.

After Jesse's first round of frustration, Dad helped him aim.

Winning came from not giving up (and from our wallets lol)

There's always someone who plays harder than you, who runs faster, who writes better, who wins more.  If you're giving your best shot, then we're proud of you. If you speak up when something goes wrong, we'll back you up.  If you act with authentic kindness, we'll love that you listened. #buryboyswillbeboys

P.S.  more on growth mindset here